One of the most common questions I get as a supervisor is what do I do with children and families. For a number of reasons interns get more anxious about this than just about anything else.
There is a lot to be learnt from seeing a whole family, rather than just meeting with a parent or a referred child, however sometimes chaos ensues! The following ideas are based on my own experiences over a dozen years. You need to develop your own style; however this might provide a starting point.
Should I meet with the adults first before meeting with the child?
I invite the immediate family members including children over 4-5 years to the initial assessment. Some clinicians prefer to meet with the adults first. In some cases you may want to arrange a professionals meeting before seeing any family members (e.g., abuse cases). There are costs and benefits of each, so think about the issues, age of the referred child and what you are comfortable with as a clinician. Most of what is written below relates to an initial ‘family session’.
Heading them off at the Pass : Create a ‘Child-Friendly’ culture from the outset.
Children are usually brought to therapy by their parent/carer(s). They may be ambivalent about attending, and sometimes are not informed or are misinformed about the purposes of their attendance (e.g., “we’re going to see the doctor”). In cases where they are told, it may well be in terms of ‘you are the problem’ and so unsurprisingly children need a little warming-up before they can become active customers of therapy.
I will always have at least some pencils or felt-tip pens and lots of paper, and depending on the age of the child may have other toys (e.g., tea-set, dolls, figures, plastic animals, construction toys like wooden blocks/lego, simple puzzles, few books). Think about how the room is set up. Is it sufficiently child-friendly and safe? When children enter the room I usually ask that they sit down for the first part of the assessment, and then can draw or play with the toys “after I’ve found out a little about you all”. The overall guide here is: children need firm and reasonable boundaries and warmth and genuine interest in them. Our job is to provide a structure that meets these two aspects.